Stay strong no matter what

Sometimes keeping the faith is a hard thing to do.  It seems like when you are doing everything that you know to be the right thing that that is the time that the devil will hop on your back and ride you like there is no tomorrow.  The hardest thing sometimes to remember is that he is only doing his job and it is important that you keep your eyes focused on God and do your job of trusting in the power and blood of Jesus to protect you. The really bad part is when the devil uses family members to fight against you. Just remember it is not that person it is the spirt inside of them. As the Bible says, We battle not against flesh and blood but, against princeapalities in the air. When it is someone close to you that is hard to do. Sometimes it is hard to do when it is a stanger. For me it is hard to do with friends and or family members because I have had to battle with rejection and a spirt of unwantedness due to my biological father and his family.  Still to this day the devil does try to use this against me and sometimes I have to admit that I do fall into his traps but, it is not as bad as it was and now at least I know what it is and I can get the prayer I need to get out of the trap.  Will I ever be perfect? Nope not until I get to Heaven.  Everyone has flaws and if we could just remember that then maybe we wouldn't be so had on each other.   As Christians I think we are harder on each other because we expect that since we are Christians that we should be perfect but, that is just not the case. Yes some Christians are farther along than others but, that doesn't mean they are any better than the other person because they still have junk that they are other coming.   When a Christian feels that they have made it to perfection that is when they are truly believing a lie because no one can be perfect.  There was only one perfect person on earth and that was Jesus.  It gets easier to spot the pitfalls and traps that the devil sets up but please continue to be on gaurd he is not stupid he will think of new things to trip you up. He will use your family against you, even your spouse.  Sometimes not everything is as it seems. May God bless the reader of this blog. Stay strong and keep fighting for your soul stay strong and never let go of God's hand.

The devil's 4th attempt to kill me

I was 9 years old and I woke up that day just like any other day and got out of bed and went in to the kitchen for breakfast.   Only on this day I wasn't expecting that my day would go so horribly wrong.   After breakfast I started to feel a little queasy so I told my mom and she had me lay down on the couch and watch cartoons hoping that whatever it was would pass and that I would be okay.   After laying there awhile my head started to hurt and I told my mom that I had a headache so she felt my head and said I felt a little warm to her so she took my temperature.   I was running a low grade temperature (under 101) so she gave me some children's Tylenol and I layed back down. The peace didn't last long because my stomach started churning and I ran to the bathroom and my breakfast came back up. My mom came to my side and cleaned me up and put me back on the couch.  She got made me some jello water to sip on and a trashcan for just in case.   The longer I layed there the worse I felt.   My head started hurting worse and nothing I drank would stay down.  My mom took my temperature again and it was rising (102).  She called my dad (she got married when I was 4 and that is who will forever be my dad) who was at work and told him that they needed to get me to the emergency room because my temperature was spiking and I wasn't holding anything down.   He hurried home and they rushed me to the emergency room, by now the pain in my head was so bad it hurt to move or even open my eyes.   The nurse at the emergency room came to the car and got me in a wheelchair and rushed me straight into a room because my doctor had called ahead and they were waiting for me.  The movement of the wheelchair was so painful in my head that all I could do was cry.  They took my vitals as soon as they got me on the bed and found the my temperature had spiked to 105 degrees (yes you read that right) they immediately started trying to get my temperature down. They took blood samples and tried starting an IV.   My veins were so small and were I was dehydrated did not help at all and on top of that the 2 nurses that they had starting the IV I do not believe were the brightest of the staff.  After several attempts they finally got the IV in and then the one nurse reached over the other nurse to "help" her turn on the IV and she accidentally ripped the IV out of my arm before the other nurse had taped it down. At this point my mom was outraged so both nurses walked out and they brought in an anesthesiologist who popped the IV right in.  The doctors ordered a spinal tap to be done, which is extremely painful and they had to tap 3 times to get what they needed for the test. When the results finally came back they had determined that I had Spinal Meningitis.  The doctor called the children's hospital and they transferred me there by ambulance.   I stayed in the hospital for a week with an IV running high powered antibiotics going through it, but still the spinal meningitis was there and the doctors told my parents that there was nothing more that they could do for me.  They sent me home and my mom immediately called in prayer warriors because she refused to allow me to die. People came to pray and I was anointed with oil and prayed for.  The next morning I woke up and I was completely and perfectly fine.  I had been healed.  My doctor was amazed that I was alive and that I had no side affects, not even brain damage, nothing.  Again the devil had lost another battle against my life.

The devil's 2nd & 3rd attempt to hurt and kill me

If you have read my last blog you know how the devil tried to kill me at brith and since that didn't work he figured he would try to cripple me. When I was 18 months old my mother took me in to have routine vaccinations, 1 of which was a polio vaccination.  Well from that 1 vaccination I developed polio because instead of that vaccination keeping me from getting polio it gave me polio.  My feet turned in and under and I was unable to walk.  Before this I was albe to walk and run around like other 18 month old babies.   Needless to say my mother was devastated.  Here she was a single mom trying to make it and now her perfectly healthy normal baby was all of a sudden crippled.  That right there would be something to shake anyone's faith.  The doctors set up an appointment to have me fitted for corrective shoes which would help me to be able to at least walk.  Well my mom kept her faith because she believed in the healing power of Jesus so she kept on praying.  Yes she did get me the corrective shoes and the doctors set up an appointment to have me fitted for braces. Well right before the brace appointment the church that my mom went to was having a revival and my mom took me and when they had people come forward for healing you better believe my mama carried me right up there.   The evangelist who was praying anointed me with oil and prayed and then he told my mom "take off her shoes and socks and tell her to run up and down the isles; now remember if I didn't have my corrective shoes on I would fall flat on my face; but in faith and believing in the power of prayer and healing my mama took was obedient and took my shoes and socks off and told me to run and yes I did I ran the isle and I did not fall God had healed my feet and took the polio away.  Needless to say my mom canceled the brace appointment because of course they were no longer needed because God the healer the ultimate doctor had healed her baby.  I want to say this I am not against vaccinations at all in fact all of my children have always had all of their's.   I just had adverse reactions to the vaccines I even ended up with German measles after having the vaccine after that the doctor signed saying I was not to have anymore vaccinations due to risk factors.   The devil has attacked my immune system. I am believe that God will heal that also because it ia getting better.  God is an on time God.  Also when I the polio thing didn't work the devil tried to have me struck by lighting.  I was about 2 or 3 and I was standing up playing with some toys in the house and we were having a thunderstorm when all of a sudden my mother said she saw a bolt of light come in the window that was open and it was coming straight for my forehead and at the moment it would have hit me she said it looked as if someone pushed me down and the lighting missed me and went right through were I was standing and straight out the other open window.  My mother believed that an angel of God pushed me down.  This was not the devil's last attempt either.  Stay tuned there is more to come. As always my God truly bless the reader of this blog.

The devil tried to kill me

I have decided to share in this blog how the devil has tried to kill me from the time of my birth.  My mother was in hard labor with me for 72 hours; yes 72 hours now this was back in 1973 and technology has come a long way since then and she was an unwed youn mother to be and that was frowned upon, my head was stuck in the birth canal and her bones would not separate for her to be able to push me out.  Well every time she would have a contraction the nurses would tell her to bear down. Well the her doctor finally comes in and examines her and during the exam she has a contraction and the doctor yells at her to stop bearing down because the pressure could break the baby's neck.  So now my mom was so panicked because she had been bearing down all that time. Doctor reached in and tried to manually turn me because I was turned wrong and it didn't work but, it ended up hurting my mom's back. The ended up doing a C-section and when I was born my head was swollen the size of my shoulders and the doctors told my mom that she would be lucky if I didn't have brain damage. The next thing that I am going to share I am not sharing to air my deceased mother's dirty laundry because this was part of her testimony and she didn't have a problem with me sharing.   My mother had been attending a church trying to get her life back with God,  she was in her 20's and she had backslid due to some things that had happened in her life and she was vulnerable.  The married pastor at the church started showing her attention in the name of ministry of course and he convinced her that by them being together she was helping his ministry and that he was going to leave his wife and be with her because it was the rifht thing to do. Well nine months later I came along and he denied me and he and his family prayed that I would die in the womb or at birth and they almost got their wish but, God had other plans for my life. By the next day of my birth the swelling of my head had went down and the doctors gave me a clean bill of health. The nurses tried to convince my mom that the right thing to do would be to put me up for adoption but,  she was adamant about raising me herself.  You would think that this experience would turn my mom away from church but, no she went back to her home church the one she first got saved in and rededicated her life back to God and she had me dedicated.   Now I wish I could say that all has been roses from then on but, that would be a lie. If you want to read more about me and my life just stay turned I promise there will be more to come.  Until next time my God truly bless you and keep you wrapped in His loving arms.

Keeping that spark alive and turning it into a flame

I have been to marriage seminars and workshops where they tell you that it is so important to have a date night with your husband and I was always the one that was thinking in the back of my mind, "yeah ok and what about the kids thats not fair to them if when we do have the extra money to do something that we selfishly spend it on ourselves having fun without them". When in reality I was the one who was being selfish not only to myself but, to my husband as well and to our children. Yes we have children but, we owe it to them to be an example of a loving husband and wife who take time for each other because when we don't everything tends to become routine and boring and that is when Satan will try and get a foot hold in your marriage.  Now let me say this first and foremost no one has a perfect marriage and I don't care who they are or how much money they have. There are times when your spouse is going to get on your very last nerve and ride it like an 8 second bull rider.  Believe me I know because I have rod that bull and so has my husband but, because we believe in the vows that we took on our wedding day and retook on our 14 year anniversary we are in this for the long haul until death do us part.  People now days use divorce as an easy out because they don't feel like working at their marriage.  Well I got news for you "Marriage like anything else in life that you want is gonna take work for it to continue to grow". Now let me throw this in there before anyone desides to get mad, I am,not against divorce because in some cases it is necessary and it is in the Bible the do's and don'ts of divorce.  Both myself and my husband have been divorced due to enfadelity on the other spouse's behalf not ours and some other major issues that I won't get into right now but, maybe at another time if the Holy Spirit leads me too. So finally here lately my husband and I have been going out once a week thanks to some gift cards that were given to us for our anniversary and we have really been having a nice time just spending maybe an hour talking and reconnecting which is extremely important. Yes we are with each other daily but, it is important to have that alone time where we are not thinking about what they kids are fighting about, what bills need paid this week, etc just face to face no phones just talking and giving your undivided attention even if you are just talking about crazy stuff that no one else would get but you can two do.  This is just like spending time with God because whenever you have a personal relationship with God you can tell him anything because even if it doesn't make sense to others it does to Him because what matters to you matters to God. You have to spend time daily with God and then just think of Sundays and Wednesdays as your date night when you get to go give all your attention to him and worship him and learn more about him.  This is the way that you can turn that spark into a flame.

When Life Throws You A Curve Ball

Every morning I pray about what I should write and today I am feeling led to write about a curve ball that got thrown into my life when I was 19 years old. It was May 14th,  1993 and I had just given birth to my 2nd child only this time I was rushed in for an emergency c-section because the baby was going into distress.  They did what is called a spinal block before cutting me open but, I was not fully numb and I still felt a lot of the cutting and things that were going on to get my baby out safely.  As soon as he was safely out they put me to sleep and when I awoke later I was able to hold and see  my little boy for the first time.  During his feedings he didn't eat very good and he would projectile vomit like something from an alien movie, it was really scary for a young mother, but the nurses assured me that he was fine.  They released us from the hospital and over the next month we were in and out of the doctor's office having tests run and they even changed his formula 5 times but, nothing was helping and my baby was losing weight. His face was sunk in his belly looked swollen he was heartbreaking to look at. He was on every prayer list we knew because I was in church with him and I had him dedicated his first Sunday home from the hospital.  Our church had anointed him with oil and had even prayed for him. I prayed till I was blue in the face. I started to blame myself even though I had done everything by the book while I was pregnant and I was a faithful Christian.  I felt so lost and so alone.  Finally the doctor decided to send him to the children's hospital to have some stomach scans done. The hospital was 1 1/2 hours away so we packed a bag and headed out. We were admitted to the hospital because the scan would be done the nezt morning and my baby could not have anything to drink after midnight that night.  That was hard since it was like he was already starving and now this. The next morning came and we did the scan and immediately they found the problem.  My little boy had pyloricstenosis meaning the tube to his stomach was cloaed off and he really was starving.  They sent us back to out room while they waited for an operating toom to open and I signed all the necessary paperwork.  While I was waiting for them to come get my baby I held him and rocked him while praying and watching The 700 Club. When all of a sudden they stopped praying and looked straight at the camera and said "their is a woman in the hospital with her son and he has a stomach problem and God is healing him right now".  In that very moment I felt a heat and I knew that they were talking about us. An orderly came in and asked for me to follow him because the doctors had decided to do one more scan before surgery.  During this scan they had me feed my baby a bottle while they scanned the whole process and all of this was being recorded.  It really was amazing to watch because the formula got to the blockage the doctors had told me about but, this time we all watched as it miraculously opened and my baby finally was able to have food in his belly.  The doctors were in amazement,  they kept rewinding the tape and playing it over and over and soon they room was full of doctors and interns just standing in awe.  They immediately discharged us and sent us home. We went back to our family pediatrician to discuss it and he said your baby is perfectly healthy, you know God healed him so take him home and enjoy him. From that day forward he had no more problems as far as health issues but, of course he was a typical teenager.  Although he was raised in church my mother was a big influence on that because when my kids lived with her because of a nasty divorce that I went through when they were little although I did play an active role in their lives.  When my mother passed away it was devastating for all of us even my current husband and all of our children.   My mother had taught me how to love unconditionally because she showed that with all of her grandchildren and she loved my husband as her own son.  Well that baby that God healed, he is 21 years old and he just finished his second year in college.   This is only one miracle that God has performed in mine and my family's life so stay tuned for more testimonies.  When life throws you a curve ball sometimes you just have to catch it and throw it back.

The little things in life

Sometimes my days are filled with the hectic sounds of, "mommy she took my stuff, he/she hit me, no he/she hit me first, he/she is looking at me" or when having to ride in the car at time it is "mommy he/she is looking out my window, are we there yet, I need to use the bathroom, I'm thirsty or their touching my part of the seat". Now God has blessed me to be able to raise 10 children (3 born of my tummy and 7 born of my heart) and I have loved each one the same and with unconditional love, even when they were teenagers and on my last have a nerve.  Togther we have made some good memories and we have also had some not so good memories, but as a family you have to learn to take the good with the bad.  I think Jesus taght us that with the disciples.  They were kind of like bratty kids at times and rebellious teenagers.   I mean thunk about it. Jesus is in the garden praying so hard that he is sweating blood and all he asked the disciples to do was to stay awake and the minute his back is turned they totally zonk out.  Then you have they time when the little kids were teying to get cloae to Jesus and the disciples were like "go away little kid" and Jesus was like "no let them come to me" Then then one disciple Judus betrays him for money and then look at Peter he denied him three times like he was embarrassed of him.  Just like if you showed up at your kids high school and they was hanging with their cool friends and here you walk in and one of their friends says "ain't that your daddy" and your are looking around and you spot your dad in that hawiian shirt, with khaki shorts, black socks and his Sunday dress shoes waving at you like a nerd, he is straight up gonna be lije nope and turn around and walk away. So I really do feel that even though Jesus did not biologically have children while He was here on earth (although yes Jesus is God's Son) he knew what it was like to deal with kids because he had to put up with the 12 disciples.  I have 3 left at home and really sometimes it doesn't feel any different than it did when there was 6 in the house at once and sometimes 8.  My quite times now during the summer are at 6:30 am when my husband leaves for work and the kids are still asleep. I get my hot cup of coffee and sit in my comfy chair in the living room and write my blog, pray, read the Bible and praise the Lord.  I think sometimes we tend to forget to thank God for the little things in our life but, we continue to ask or expect more and more just like our kids do sometimes.  When in a confrontation with my children I start out by looking at it as if is this something that really matters or am I just trying to get them to do it my way even though if they do it their way it is still the right way.  Now I am by no means saying that if you have told your child to do something a specific way and they refuse to do then that is ok because that is not ok because that is letting the devil get a foot hold in on rebellion and that is of the sin of witchcraft.  What I am saying if that if you give them a job to do think about it before you aproach them, your kids might really surprise you because sometimes they really have some good ideas. I will be up front and honest with you I am not the perfect mother and my children grown or otherwise are not perfect but, we are a family.  There are 3 of our children who are grown who have decided that they want to be independent and have nothing to do with us or God. We continue to pray for them and love them. 

Be Yourself

It is always best to be yourself because if you try to be someone that you are not just to please someone else in the long run you will be the one who will be suffering.   I ended up learning that the hard way when I was in my 20s and I made not only myself miserable but, also those around me too. I ended resenting those people for wanting me to be someone that I wasn't when in reality it wasn't their fault,  it was my fault because I was not only lying to myself but, I was also lying to others, being a people pleaser is a real hard bondage to break out of but , belive me it can be done and yes Satan will continue to set traps up sometimes daily,  sometimes several times a day just because he wants to trip you up. If you were not an important part of the army of God then Satan wouldn't attack you. I always know when I am doing something right because that's when Satan fights the hardest. The really sad part is sometimes Satan will use the people that you are closest to to get to us, to get us to stop doing what we know is right. I hope this will encourage someone because I really felt led to write this because normally I would be in bed asleep right now.  God bless the reader of this blog and may they come to know you and grow in your presence and perfect peace.  Lord we know that you did not promise that we would always have a mountain top experience because to get to the next mountain you have to walk through the valley but, Jesus you did promise that you would never leave us nor forsake us. So we stand on your promises that you are with us always even until the end. Thank  you Holy Spirit for being our comforter.  We stand upon your promises oh God. We love you Lord.