Nothing to do

Well the kids are back in school.  I just was not able to home school them because they did not want to do the work that I gave them without a constant battle so the best choice for everyone was to put them back in public school.  Now after taking a few minutes a day to clean the house I have nothing to do.  A person can only watch so much tv and play so many video games before you feel that your brain is turning to mush and you feel like screaming from pure boringness. At least when carnival season starts up maybe we can do that.  I feel like I am losing my mind sometimes because I have no one to talk to and the dogs don't talk back.  I would find a job right now but that is pointless because my hubby really doesn't want to me have a job.  I am even having trouble with writing  my blog because I have nothing to write about that seem interesting enough for anyone to read.  At times it feels like all of my nerves are running at once and going crazy and that is not a good feeling at all.  I am waiting to hear back from my knee doctor because the pain in my knees is so bad that I am finding no relief at all and it is killing me.  I am waiting for them to get the shipment in for the injections, not cortizone injections because I have already had those but, a cushion that they are going to inject because my knees are rubbing bone on bone and it is horribly painful.  Between that and the fibromyalga I feel like a big ball of pain most of the time.  I have been doing singing videos which I love because I love to sing.  My mom loved singing too.  Today is her birthday which she is celebrating in heaven.  Maybe that is why I am having a hard time today.  being without her is really hard.  She was the most awesome woman.  I also miss spending time with my daughter and she lives so far away I just wish she would come home.  I missed a lot with my mom living far away and I don't feel like I spent enough time with her and if I would have known that she would have been leaving so soon then I would have spent more time with her and I just don't want my daughter to have to go through what I am going through.  I don't want anyone to have to know the pain of regrets that I am living.  Spend whatever time you can with the family or friends that love you because before you know it they will be gone and you will have missed out on some great moments that you can never get back.