Kids

Ok so I love all my kids with all of my heart. I am always available for them so if they need me I am here for them. Call me anytime and I  will be an ear to listen to them, a shoulder to cry on or whatever.  Sometimes though I  don't understand them at all. It seems as though they get passed at me for not reason at all or at least for reasons that they don't tell me so q stay constantly in the dark about where our relationship stands. It puts a lot of stress on me and I don't know why I do this to myself.  I want my kids to be happy and I hate when they are not. I am not a pushy mom either because I don't try to make them be in a relationship with me. If they don't want to talk to me I don't push them. They are grown and they have to realize that life is short and they won't get the time back that they are losing when they are not speaking to me. I stay confused and I hate feeling like I am not good enough for my children.   I missed out on a lot of time being spent with my mom because I was stubborn and I wanted things my way. I mean I still talked to her but I should have been there for her more than I was and I have to live with those regrets for the rest of my life because she is gone now and I cannot get that back. I also have regrets about my dad because in the end I thought that he didn't want to talk to me and I stopped calling him. I wish I would have just swallowed my pride and called him and went to see him. I let so much crap stand in the way and now he is gone and I can't get that back. I just don't want my kids to have to go through life with regrets because it will eat at you every day for the rest of your life.