TGIF

Oh yeah today is Friday and tomorrow we are going to go to the big city of Lexington to visit family and friends.  I just pray that everything goes good because I absolutely would hate to drive for 2 hours to spend time with people and then they act like butt heads.  I can't stand drama, that is one of the reasons we live so far away because we are in a small town and by ourselves and it is wonderful.  The only drama that we generally have to deal with is when one of the kids gets and attitude.  They are scheduled to see councilors but that won't be until they go back to school after spring break.  I am in a way looking forward to spring break, which is this week but, in a way I am dreading it.  I never know what kind of mood the kids are going to be in.  I have some craft projects that I want to do with them and I am just praying that they can at least do good and get along with each other for the week.  I don't know that Dalton will want to do all the craft projects and stuff but, I know that Kia-Leigh will.  Also we are going to go outside and clean up the back yard because whoever lived here before were slobs.  So we want our back yard to look good so we can put out a grill and lawn furniture and things of that nature.  I also want to put in a horseshoe pit because I love playing horseshoes.  I am also going to get a hammock, one that has it's own stand.  They have them at Kroger's for $100 so that really isn't that bad.  I want to get my husband a grill for Father's Day.  For his birthday probably the hammock.  His birthday and Father's Day are both in June.  My husband is the biggest worry wort that I have ever met.  He panics every month while waiting for his check to deposit on his card.  If it isn't on there at the exact time that he expects it to be there he panics.  Last month it did not deposit until 3:46 PM central time, and other months it has deposited on his card at 11:46 AM central time.  So as you can see it is just sporadically on.  I wouldn't panic unless it got late and it still wasn't there.  He will call the card every month and ask them if it is still active and every month they tell him the same thing yes it is active.  I mean his paycheck just deposited on it yesterday and I have used the card twice today and there is money on his card so why wouldn't it be active.  He says all the time that I don't understand that he relied on that money to be there so we can pay our rent.  Yes I fully understand that we need that money for bills but, I don't have to sit in a worried fit to not understand.  I just prefer to not stress about things that don't need to be stressed about.  I just hope that this weekend he can relax and not stress about anything because that would drive me up a wall.  He needs at least one or even two days that he can forget about everything and just relax and be the man that I fell in love with that was fun and full of life.  Lately life has really stole his joy and he has become a hateful old man and I really don't like it. Yes I am still madly in love with him and I always will be and nothing is ever going to change that but, I would love to see him really smile like he used to.  It breaks my heart that it seems that his joy has just been zapped away.  Looking back over these last 20 years that we have been together we have endured a lot of things that most couples would have broken up over.  There has been no cheating at all from either side and there has never been a thought of it either because we have a low opinion of cheaters and that is something that neither one of us ever has to worry about.  We have just experienced a lot of grief and heartache from all of our children that with some of them has ripped our hearts to shreds.  We have experienced loss as far as the passing of my mom and dad.  We have had fur babies that we had for years pass away.  We have moved and lost all of our belongings and had to start over many times but, through all of the things that we have been through I feel that it has in a way strengthened us and made us grow up.  We are responsible now and the first thing that we do every week and every month is pay our bills.  Yes there are some weeks that we only have the money to pay our bills and then have nothing extra to just get our wants but, we realize that at least our bills are paid and we are able to relax and know that we have everything that we really need.  I go live on Tik Tok at 7:30 AM Monday-Friday and I am starting to get a little bit of a following on there.  We sit and talk about anything and everything while enjoying our morning coffee.  It is really nice getting to know new people even though it is just an Internet friendship.  I feel like if I can just be there for at least one person then that is a good thing.  My husband doesn't like me to do any media stuff when he is home because when he is home he wants me to be spending time with him which I fully understand.  So that is why I really don't get on the Internet on the weekends or evenings because we are spending our time together.  Also he has a lot of health issues that cause him pain and plus he works hard at his job to support us and when he gets home in the evenings he is in a lot of pain and he is tired.  I like to be there for him so I really don't mind giving him my undivided attention.  Well today I took my live on the road and took everyone with me while I paid bills and went shopping.  It was a lot of fun for me because it felt like I wasn't really alone.  I was able to find some really good deals today I got some Easter basket stuffers for my daughter and some other things.  My husband doesn't know how much money I have spent and I really don't want him to know.  I did get the things that he wanted me to buy like trash bags, dryer sheets and dish washing liquid and I got it at next to nothing because normally we would spend about $6 on kitchen trash bags, $5 on black trash bags, $3 on dish washing liquid and $3 on dryer sheets for a grand total of $17 plus tax, well I got everything for $5 plus tax for a grand total in savings of $12.  I think that is a good deal.  Also I got 4 things of deodorant, 2 dove 48 hour protection dry spray and 1 axe deodorant spray and 1 axe roll on deodorant.  If you went to the store to buy those you would pay $16 plus tax but I only paid $6 plus tax for them for a savings of $10.  I also go 2 foam pantine conditioners for $2 plus tax.  For an early Easter present I got my hubby an electronic Bible and Pac Man headphones.  I think that is something that he will like because he wants to read the Bible but, it is hard for him because he has trouble seeing the words and also he really isn't that good at reading so this is a way that he can hear the Bible and it will be good for him because it also has music downloaded on it.  I'm sure that in the evenings when he is trying to relax and go to sleep that he will use it to listen to.  I swear I think that upstairs has a heard of elephants living with them because them stomp back and forth through their house and it sounds like they are about to come through the ceiling.  Well today is half day for the kids because for some reason on Fridays they have half day of school.  They get home 2 hours earlier than normal so they are home now.  I am going to close for now and more than likely I won't be able to write again until Monday morning so until then, Peace and Love to all my family and friends.